Baby Class III

I’d like to post about five more books. I’d also like to have an extra brain to plug in when the normal one winds down. No such luck. I am reading three books (not literally at the same time, but bits and pieces of each at the same time frame), and I’m continuing my single minded goal of reading 50 new books in 2009.

Meanwhile, it was back to the land of drugs, pain and deep breathing- baby class. I was deeply amused when she mentioned prostaglandin (hope I spelled that right), which is a gel used to simulate the effects of sperm on the uterus– and thus, to possible commence labor. You’ve never heard so many people artfully trying to find a way to ask “Is it safe for me to have sex now/later/now and later with my pregnant wife/girlfriend/lady friend/etc etc?”

We also got to see a large number of painful looking invasive things that have to be done during birth. My personal favorite, and by favorite, I mean most odd and strange, was the use of a vaccum cup to pull out the baby. Visualize trying to stick one side of a NERF basketball goal to the baby’s head and yanking, and you’ve got the general idea (well, but with a vaccum feed attached to the thing, and no other side to the goal, and no foam basketball, and a lot of pain. So really they have nothing in common.).

I think this is the quasi-official weekend of buying the crib. I’m hoping it will coincide with the weekend Joe buys hot chicken again. And possibly not being the weekend in which Joe is again approached with an offer of sale of drugs outside the hot chicken establishment. Julie assures me it’s because the drug dealer was not used to encountering a lawyer talking on a cell phone with his mother (which yes, is exactly what I was doing) on a Saturday night outside the hot chicken shack.

I also notice that we’re about six weeks away from the one year anniversary of this blog (and about 81 days away from the projected date of arrival of my daughter, lest anyone think my priorities are skewed). I would have some sort of great party or Internetting event, but frankly, I have no idea what that would encompass. Feel free to include ideas, if you have any.


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4 Responses to “Baby Class III”

  1. barboo77 Says:

    Just to clarify, the vacuum cup thing should only be used if absolutely necessary. It is not routine. Vacuum extraction is an alternative to forceps extraction and both can cause physical damage.

    Before you buy a crib, seriously think about the sleep habits that each of you have and whether or not Julie plans to breastfeed. We’ve actually done better having a big family bed (a twin and queen pushed side by side). I sleep better when I just have to roll over to nurse the baby in the night rather than having to actually get up. Thankfully Ricky sleeps through anything. Our crib ended up being the world’s most expensive clothing rack.

    As for the gel…Ricky and I have a running joke. He puts them in and nine months later he takes them out. 😉

  2. Teresa Says:

    The blogging anniversary should involve hot chicken. Any excuse is a good excuse for hot chicken. The birth of your daughter should also involve hot chicken. I wonder if the hospital takes special dining requests….

  3. d_ustin Says:

    Something about one of your sentences triggered the memories of when the spiders occured. I present the return of altavista translator (horse force):
    “Julia assures me it that is because they had not used the trader to find a lawyer who speaks in a cellular telephone with its mother (which yes, is accurately what fêz) in a Saturday night is of the hot cabin of the hen.”
    Thank you and goodday.

    • eljoe1235 Says:

      As usual, altavista doesn’t mess around, but goes right to the heart of
      the matter. I defy anyone not to eat at the Hot Cabin of the Hen. And
      while I have no idea what a fez has to do with drug dealers, me, or
      me talking on a cell phone with my Mom, I have to admit that it would
      be a welcome addition to any or all of those things.

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